What Do You Want?

Whenever time for gift-giving came,
I asked my mother what she would like.
The answer was always the same:
I want you and your sister to love each other.
I hated that answer.
Even though my mother truly loved giving 
more than receiving,
I thought, surely, there must be something she wanted.
No matter how often I pleaded
or tried to convince her 
that others liked to feel the joy of giving she did,
the answer was always the same:
I have everything I need.

My mother has been gone for a long time now.
It turns out I'm like my mother in more ways than I knew.
Age has brought me a new appreciation
for her frustrating reply to the question,
what do you want.
When faced with that question
I am usually at a loss,
not because I'm trying to be coy
or make life difficult for those asking,
but simply because I don't know what to say.
I have everything I need.

The things I want
cannot be bought in a store
and wrapped up with pretty bows.
Some are impossible,
like feeling young again
and knowing what I do now.
Some are highly improbable, 
like world peace, curing cancer,  
and reversing global warming. 
A few things are so ridiculously expensive
I'd be embarrassed to even mention,
for fear of making someone feel bad
for not being able to pull it off.

What I want most
is time with those I love,
time to talk and laugh,
be carefree,
just to be happy in each others' company.
Time is a limited commodity,
too often wasted like leftovers, 
forgotten and growing moldy in the refrigerator.

Spending time with you
is more precious than anything.
There's no need to go into debt
or save a receipt for returns.
It's what I want.
It's all I need.
And I will treasure it forever.

~Elise Skidmore ©2024